betrayed

Wow things took a turn for the holy shit right before christmas. I went out on a limb and sent my fiancee home to spend a little portion of the holiday with her family since it was her first this far away from home, and what do I get for my troubles...she fucks another man....and then first lies to me and tells me that its her cousin, then comes clean about it and now acts like everything is fine between us. I put on a great face for the kids and will not under any circumstances ruin their holiday season, but things are not even decent between us.

I dont even like being in the same room with her right now cause all i want to do is scream at her and call her names....I mean how could she do this shit to me, there was nothing really wrong before she left and to go and do this to me is beyond understanding. How she could have put us in this position is beyond e being able to understand. I never put myself in a position where I may endanger my relationship...esp if she send me home on a trip that she paid for.

Its not making any sense to me what so ever, with everything else going on with me and the army you figure that this shit wouldnt happen. She is aware of everything that is going on with the army, but does this shit anyways. If she wants out all she had to do was tell me...I would have been fine with her leaving and not coming back. Hell now I have to make arrangements that I would have had done by now if she had just been upfront and told me what is going on.

Im so angry hurt and frustrated cause not only did she hurt me, but she has put me in a position where I have to hurt my kids or live with her and be miserable and mistrusting for the rest of my life. I am torn cause I dont want to hurt the kids but at the same time I have to be fair to myself as well.....I dont know what to do, but I am sure as always I will be able to figure it out.